I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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