he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
