They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
