My nipple is on Facebook.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
