FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
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he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
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the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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