Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
