how can u be prego again
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
