if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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