YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
too bad you live with your parents still
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Randomize
