How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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