This girl is more easily done than said...
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
