Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
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The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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