At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize