I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
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