garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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