You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
