Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
