how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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