well you can't waste a boner
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
You have to summon your inner elephant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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