Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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