i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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