pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
