she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
third nipple confirmed
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
