you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
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