"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
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