wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
