I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
