they need to just BURY HIM!
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
