i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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