Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
