Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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