sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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