you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
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Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
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This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.