i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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