Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
