i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
