And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
