Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
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