And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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