It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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