The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
