I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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