i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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