Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
