It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
soo... how was my night?
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
