Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize