My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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