i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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