Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize