You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
