just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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