ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
